Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Workin' 9 to 5, what a way to make a living!

Yesterday was my first day of work. I haven't gone to an office or job of any type since February 22, 2008, when I got a blinding headache at work and called my OB to find out if I could take extra Tylenol or maybe even (gasp!) some Motrin. Instead, I got an immediate office visit followed by a trip to the hospital because my blood pressure was insane, and then a note for partial bed rest and certainly no more working.

Then I couldn't leave Llama when she was four months old (and I know people do it all the time, I just couldn't and thankfully didn't HAVE to do it). Bucket's work is lucrative enough that we weren't going to the poorhouse with me being home, even with my naptime-induced shopping issues. And then I started school, so I wanted to spend the first semester just settling in.

But now I'm in my second semester of school. And it's a counseling program, so I want to do some counseling work. Possibly even save a little bit of money because there will come a day when I have to work full time for free (they call it internship, I think they should call it indentured servitude) and we'll have to pay for daycare for Llama.

So for the summer, I'm giving it a shot. I'm working full time, going to school full time, obviously I'm mom-ing full time, and the house is not yet a pigsty. It's only been one day, though. We're lucky enough that Aunt Dots is home from school for the summer and we are paying her to love on Llama. For an added bonus, three days a week, Llama and Tuna Roll both hang out with Aunt Dots, so she'll probably never want to have kids.

Basically, this long-winded post means that although I have pictures, I haven't uploaded them. I will tonight, though. And writings may be sporadic until I get in a rhythm, so forgive me and stick with me!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Perfectly accessorized.

(Not so wordless Wednesday.)

She may look like her daddy, but she wants to be like her mommy.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

A Zoo Adventure (Go Pens!)

Frenchy and I decided we would take Llama and Z-man to the Pittsburgh Zoo on Saturday. A good time was had by all.

At the gate, we tried to get a picture of them together in the wagon. (Please note that looking at Z-man is like looking at my brother The Army Guy 20 years ago. It's like a time machine for me.)

Both of them were cooperative with staying in the wagon, but not so cooperative for photos.

Z-man was really helpful with putting sunglasses on Llama all the time. He was kind of upset that she wouldn't wear them continuously.

Llama was anxious to show off her walking skills.

But her favorite, favorite, favorite part was the penguins. Since there was a Pens game Saturday night, we stopped to see the penguins for luck. (It didn't work.) And since Z-man has always gotten a stuffed animal at the end of his zoo trips if he was good, we stopped to buy him an animal. Llama first attached herself to a huge stuffed octopus that was as big as she was. I vetoed the octopus - first, it was too big and too expensive; second, we were NOT going to buy an octopus when that's what Detroit fans throw on the ice during the Stanley Cup finals. So I led her over to the stuffed penguins, of course. And she really liked this baby rockhopper penguin that she's carrying. (If I were a better photographer, she'd have her whole head in this picture, but I was chasing her at the same time.)

There's a Pens game tonight. GO PENS!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

The Adventures of Llama and Tuna Roll, Number 3

It's been a long time since I told a tale of Llama and Tuna Roll. Too long. They've had adventures, I just haven't told them. But I digress.

My moms' group scheduled a tour at a local dairy farm called the Spring House. It's less than 20 minutes from my house, so I signed Aunt Dots (she finally picked a name!), Tuna Roll, Llama, and me up. I thought Llama might like the cows and I thought Tuna Roll would just look around contentedly.

It was supposed to rain, so Aunt Dots and I were waiting to decide if we were actually going until the morning. But I got an email that we needed to be there by 9:45, instead of 10, which I thought. I called Aunt Dots, but got no answer. Turned out she overslept. When she called back, it was 9. Somehow, I was going to have to get from my house to Hawaiian Punch's house (where Aunt Dots and Tuna Roll were) and pick them up and then get to the Spring House in 45 minutes. Safely. Without breaking land speed records, because I don't do that with kids in the car.

I kept trying to print the directions and instructions, but my printer only wanted to print super large gibberish, so I forwarded the email to Aunt Dots for her to print. I also asked her to call the organizer, pretend to be me, and explain that we were running a bit late.

I scrambled to put a car seat for Tuna Roll in my car. Llama's, of course, was already installed in my car. I assembled juice and snacks, because Llama does not roll without snacks.

I made it to Hawaiian Punch's at 9:30, but Aunt Dots was not quite ready. Oversleeping will do that to a girl. We were on the road within 5 minutes, though. We had 10 minutes to make it to the Spring House. Not possible. I called the organizer and explained, and she said that the tours had been split, so we could still make it.

Then I asked Dots for the directions. Which were sitting on Hawaiian Punch's kitchen counter. AWESOME. I knew mostly where I was going, so I just winged it. (Wung it? That's what I say when I'm talking out loud.) Only I turned onto the right road from the wrong side, which I learned when I made Aunt Dots call the organizer AGAIN. Poor organizer.

We finally made it!

Tuna Roll petted a cow named Lilly, who stands there and lets kids milk her over and over again, all day, every day. Lilly is extremely tolerant, apparently.

Llama poked Lilly in the face a couple times and hissed at her. I guess cows are furry enough to be treated like cats. I petted Lilly nicely.

A very friendly calf tried to eat Tuna Roll's sock.

The same friendly calf licked Llama's face and hair. I guess now she has a cowlick in the front, too. (Ha!)

Llama helped feed this baby with a very big bottle. She also tried to take a drink from this very big bottle, but I stopped her.
Then everyone except Tuna Roll got ice cream cones and we went home. For naps. Because after all that, Aunt Dots and I were very tired.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

A Golf Outing and Llama's Tubes: A Timeline

Sunday, May 31.

9:30am: Bucket and Llama leave me blissfully alone in the house. They go to an antiques fair. I take a shower. It's only the second time I've been alone in the house in 13 months.
10:00am: I start running around like a chicken with its head cut off because I'm chairing a golf outing in just three short hours. It does, however, take my mind off of Llama's upcoming surgery.
11:15am: Bucket calls and wants to know where I am. What the heck, man!? I told you I have this golf thing. You have the baby. All day. There's no passing her back to me. No tag team relay races.
12:00pm: The golfers start arriving and handing me money. I like it. Alas, I cannot keep the money. It's for charity.
1:00pm: The golfers all leave and the pavilion is blissfully quiet. Bucket shows up with Llama because he can't bear to be away from the action for even three seconds. She runs amuck and gets ketchup, grease, dirt, funk, and God knows what else all over her pretty white shirt. I'm not watching her because I'M IN CHARGE OF THIS THING. Bucket's not watching her because he's talking to his friend and thinks that because I'm there, I should be watching her. Why can't I multitask being in charge of 60 adults and one small child? Whispered arguing ensues. I don't want everyone to see me yelling at him. (And yet I'll put it on the internet.)
2:30pm: It's Llama's naptime. Bucket doesn't want to leave. He wants me to make a bed for her in the back of my SUV and convince her to nap in it. Unsuccessful.
3:00pm: Llama is past tired, so she's running back and forth yelling at people and trying to eat rocks.
3:30pm: I tell Bucket to take Llama to his parents' house or our home, or for God's sake to anywhere but this golf outing. She falls asleep in the car, so he comes back with her and keeps her sleeping in the car.
4:00pm: The golf outing is out of beer. Not good. Two of my minions (ha!) go for more. They also bring Kahlua and cream and I partake in one.
5:00pm: Llama is still sleeping, so I tell Bucket he needs to wake her if he wants her to go to bed at all tonight. He is resistant.
5:15pm: Llama wakes up screaming. I would, too, if I had just slept in a car seat.
5:45pm: My golfers start coming back and the pavilion is loud again. And Llama is running back and forth like a heathen child. I decide to ignore it and hope that nobody recognizes that she's mine because she didn't come with me. Plus, I have to give out the prizes and thank people for coming and remind them that this was for a good cause, etc.
6:15pm: Bucket and Llama leave for dinner at his parents' house.
7:00pm: I kick the stragglers out and start packing the rest of the stuff into my car.
7:30pm: I arrive for dinner at Bucket's parents' house just in time to make them stop cleaning up and feed me.
8:00pm: We go home. I bathe an angry, overtired Llama and wrestle her into bed. Then I pass out on the couch.

Monday, June 1.
3:30am: Llama wakes up screaming. I give her Tylenol, rock her, and end up sleeping in the rocking chair for a while.
5:00am: Llama wakes up screaming while I'm holding her. I rock some more. Sing. She goes to sleep and I go back to my own bed.
5:45am: Llama wakes up screaming. Since the surgery instructions seem to imply that she's a Gremlin, I can only give her apple juice or water. No food and no milk. And I have to take away the juice in one short hour. So I bring her in bed with us and give her juice.
6:00am: Llama smacks Bucket in the face with her cup of juice while he's sleeping. I try really hard not to laugh. Unsuccessful.
6:15am: Llama smacks me in the face with the juice. Not as funny this time. Bucket is amused, though.
6:30am: I give up on trying to lay in bed with the jumping bean. The next hour and 45 minutes are spent trying to keep Llama out of the kitchen so she won't see food and want it.
8:15am: We leave. The surgery is not at the hospital, but at the outpatient surgery center near us. Much better for us.
9:00am: We arrive. Llama's finally sleeping, only now we have to get her back up.
9:15am: Explanations, etc. Everyone was very nice. They pretty much only talked to me, though. Bucket was my arm candy. Nobody seemed to think he knew much or could remember things like "She will be a little tired," or "She might be crabby." He didn't like it because he's used to being the big man in charge of everything. I felt bad because he was every bit as nervous as I was, he was just better at hiding it.
9:45am: The nurse came and walked away with my Llama. Llama didn't even care, because she had her bear and a pacifier. Bucket remarked that it might be the last time she goes happily with a stranger. We went to the waiting room.
9:50am: I went to the bathroom to cry and pray.
10:05am: The doctor came out and told us Llama was done and everything was okay. As soon as she woke up, we could go into recovery and be with her.
10:10am: They came to call us back into recovery. She warned us that Llama might cry a lot. She was not crying. A nurse was holding her and Llama was holding her bear with one hand and patting the nurse's face with the other. The nurse was surprised that neither Bucket nor I are blonde. I got out Llama's milk and goldfish, and she jumped on them like she'd never seen food before. She only wanted Bucket to hold her, so he did and they were both very happy.
10:20am: We were discharged.

So far, everything is great. Llama seems to be walking better and she can definitely hear better. And I will, hopefully, get back to my normal self in about 20 years.